Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Do I come off as the Simon Cowell of food or something?

alex: come by here
my office
we're ordering food
me: i cant
jim wants to meet with me
alex: lamesauce
me: just order something for me
alex: for how long
me: dunno
alex: I CANT DO TIHS BY MYSELF
okay
i'll try
me: dude i'll eat anything

Here's something you should know about me.

I judge food, and I judge what other people are eating. If I don't know you, I'm probably not going to want to know you if I see you order sesame chicken and a California roll at a sushi bar. But if you're ordering for ME, have no fear. I would never look unkindly on another person's efforts to provide me sustenance. In fact, I hate people who complain about a meal while they're still eating it. It ruins the atmosphere and boosts nobody's ego but the complainer's. When I'm out eating with friends, I rarely talk about what's being served, and if I'm asked what I think, I'll just say it's good.

Because, in truth, it's hard for food to be not good. I'm Chinese and I eat everything - there is that. But more importantly, I'm Chinese and my Dad, who lived through some of the worst food times in Chinese history, instilled me with gratitude for anything I have the privilege of eating. I have the tapes to prove it, courtesy of a 7th-grade oral history project: "I should really send you off to the nong cun, starve you for a few years so you'll know what it's like. Then, you eat anything, everything tastes good."

So, in the spirit of "eat anything, everything tastes good," Alex's choice of "
1 burger, 1 steak, 1 yellotail scallion roll, and 1 chicken wings - i hope youre hungry" will do just fine for lunch.

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